by Mary Kevin and Mike Watts
Sung by You
to the tune of "The Battle Hymn of the Republic"The Rattled Din of the Rolled Plastic
Mine eyes have seen the horrors of the rolling of the dice.
When the DM starts to rattle them, my blood just turns to ice.
I know that we’ll be blown to bits, and not just once but twice.
Oh, please, please put them down!
Oh go ahead and roll them, you must do what you must do.
And if any are left standing, they will all be black and blue.
If we’d only solved that puzzle and not waited for the clue,
Our team might still advance!
Gory, Gory, what a blood bath! Our DM’s gone on the warpath.
More dice have not been rolled since T-S-R was sold!
Our characters are dust!
